Baby Pet Peeves

I was at brunch today with my sister, father, and his girlfriend when I encountered one of my biggest pet peeves. It’s not quite up there with people who say “personal opinion,” but it’s close.

We were discussing the recent preponderance of baby showers that my sister has had to attend, when my dad’s girlfriend asked her about yesterday’s shower specifically.

“Does she know the sex of the baby?”

“Yes, she’s having a girl.”

“Oooh, how nice!”

I don’t mean to pick on my father’s girlfriend because everyone seems to do this, but would she have been disappointed if she found out it was going to be a boy? Every time I hear a person find out the sex of someone else’s baby, they always act really excited, as if that was the answer they were hoping for.

As I see it, there is no reason for anyone to have a vested interest in the gender of someone else’s baby, particularly if they barely know the person, which is the case here. A baby’s gender is pertinent information, but it’s not news that should elicit a reaction that is either positive or negative, it should simply be digested. However, I would be amused if someone reacted to hearing the gender by glumly saying, “oh, that’s too bad.” It’s never happened though.

Now when it comes time for me to be a father (don’t worry Mom, it will happen eventually), I will certainly care. In a perfect world, I’d have a boy and a girl. But if I could only choose one, I’d prefer a boy for the simple fact that I know it will be easier for me to relate to a boy. A less pressing reason is that a boy would also give me a greater chance of having my spawn make millions as a professional athlete.

Anyway, my only theory as to why people always pretend to be excited when they hear the gender of someone else’s baby is that they think that this kind of news deserves an excited response. I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t.

This gender thing got me thinking of another pet peeve of mine that also has to do with reproduction. It’s become trendy in recent years to hear couples say, “we’re pregnant.” This drives me absolutely insane.

And when I say this, it’s not because I am trying to win points with feminists by acknowledging that men don’t have any idea what being pregnant is like. It bothers me because it’s just not true. I’ve been told that couples say “we’re pregnant” as a way of demonstrating just how much of a group effort the whole process is going to be, but that’s horseshit. The man can help all he wants, but he’s got the easy part.

If a couple wants to say, “we’re expecting,” that’s fine. But “we’re pregnant” is not.